Pretend
by lauralizzie07
Summary: Mal/River. One shot, post BDM. Why did his little psychic smell like Inara?


"Pretend"  
Mal/River, PG  
Post BDM

"I'd never be with a woman unless I _wanted_ to be with her," he said softly. "I'd never pretend."

(This is for Christa, who looked at me with her puppy dog eyes and asked for some River/Mal fluff)

--

Of all the things about Inara, he missed her scent the most. It was fresh and clean, a little sweet—sandalwood and jasmine. When he closed his eyes, he could imagine her gliding onto the bridge, leaning over his shoulder and whispering, "your overall speed is disproportionate to the momentum required to land this ship."

Wait. What?

"River?" Why the hell did his little psychic smell like Inara?

River smiled slowly, her face an inch away from his. "She sent me a bottle of her smelly oil. Do you like it?"

The captain exhaled heavily. "It's real nice." Disconcerted by her brown eyes, large and expectant, he leaned away from River, adjusting the speed of descent. "You do have your own chair, lil' Albatross."

The girl's smile grew as she straightened and glanced toward her abandoned co-pilot chair. She shook her head and perched delicately on the edge of Mal's seat. "The view is much more satisfactory from here," she purred, holding his gaze.

Mal glanced at the door, trying not to panic. "River, are you feelin' okay? D'you want me to get the Doc?"

She shook her head again, resting her hands on Mal's shoulders. "Simon's presence would be considerably uncomfortable," she said, starting to close the distance between their mouths, only to be unceremoniously pushed off the chair. Mal stood, running his fingers through his hair, trying to process what was happening. River's eyes, filled with anticipation a moment before, started to water.

"I thought…" she whispered. "You miss her so much. I thought that if I smelled like her, if you could pretend…"

Mal rested his hands gently on her shoulders. "I'd never be with a woman unless I _wanted_ to be with her," he said softly. "I'd never pretend." River's eyes lit up again and she tilted her face towards his, asking to be kissed, but Mal just shook his head. "That's not what I meant, little one."

River searched his face, hoping he would smile and tell her he was joking. But Mal's eyes didn't wrinkle at the corners; they just stared down at her solemnly. "Of course," she said, straightening, "I understand completely." Mal reached for his crestfallen psychic, but the computer started beeping as they hit atmo on Persephone and River slipped away before he could stop her.

--

Mal tried to focus on the job at hand, he really did. The problem was that he saw his little psychic everywhere. She hid around corners, lurking just out of reach. He felt her eyes watching him as he left Badger's office, contact in hand.

"Sir, are you feeling okay?" Zoë's voice, low and quizzical, sounded in his ear.

Mal jumped, "why wouldn't I feel okay? I feel great." Great, except the image of River's sad brown eyes were imprinted into his mind. He hated upsetting her, but what else was he supposed to do? She was more mature than other girls her age, but she was still only seventeen. Seventeen going on eighteen. Eighteen was legal; eighteen meant she was an adult. River was forward; she knew what she wanted. And she wanted him. She saw his anger and the violence in his mind and she still wanted him.

"Any luck, Captain?" Simon asked, leaning against the wall of the cargo hold as they plodded back onto the ship.

Mal's mind started racing. How much did Simon know? Did she tell him? With Mal's luck, Simon would whisk his little sis away from Serenity as fast as he could. He'd probably take Kaylee along with him and he'd be out a doctor, mechanic _and_ a co-pilot. And a lover. Well, a potential lover. Mal was just happy River was the only Tam with psychic ability. "Good," he said, swallowing hard. "Got a job."

River's soft voice carried down the stairs into the cargo hold. "Where are we going?"

Mal climbed the stairs slowly. "We're going to Dyton colony," he said, placing his hand on the small of her back, guiding her gently toward the bridge. "Badger's home planet. You can brush up on your accent," he said, grinning down at her.

River shrugged, sliding into her chair and starting to flip switches. "We should be able to make it in 15 to 20 hours. Is there a time constraint?"

"No, uh, no." Mal leaned over her chair, "are we all right?"

"Why wouldn't we be all right?" River's voice was cool and she refused to look at Mal. Serenity banked hard as they broke atmo and River grimaced. "I'm sorry," she murmured, patting the side of the ship.

Mal turned River's chair, forcing her to face him. "I'm sorry I hurt you, little one," he whispered, kneeling down to her level. She bit her lip, averting her eyes. Mal grinned crookedly and reached out to take her hand. "Want me to make it up to you?" River's mouth twitched, but she tried to hide her smile.

"I thought you never pretended," she said, glancing over at him.

Mal's eyes crinkled and his grin grew wider as he pulled her out of the chair and into his arms. "Who's pretending?" he whispered, pulling her into a kiss. He could smell her soap—floral, sweet, and undeniably River.


End file.
